Corset/Waist Instruction: Day time 1

Waist Training Day 1 & 2SO my new corset arrived last night, size 22, as my waist measures 26”.White and under bust.I’ll put some pictures up soon too.o:p>Wore it for 2 hours last night and cried when it came off – so painful.

drooling over her, pack up your blue balls and go home.Ladies, if a co-worker asks you to get drinks after work and you feel a little uncomfortable, come up with an excuse and just don’t go.Even if you’re already neck-deep in a problem, it doesn’t mean you can’t begin changing your reactions.If you’re feeling tempted in some way you may want to seek out some individual therapy to work out those feelings and determine if they’re ‘real’ and warrant maybe splitting from your current partner, or if it’s strictly temptation and how to go about dealing with that (and your clearly weak constitut.

product making it very practical when you’re using a lot during more challenging play sessions, and it’s not scented or flavoured either which is perfect for users with sensitive skin and mucous membranes.It also has aloe vera and is ph “optimised” to match your body.

The flip top bottle is great for those moments when you need lube fast and don’t want to spoil the moment.It opens with one hand and closed easily and securely so you get the lube when and where you want it without the risk of subsequent spillage.We were sent three different sizes of the lube – 50, 100 and 250 ml.Interestingly the 205 ml size does not have the flip top, it has a more conventional screw top.But you could use it as a refill pack and buy one of the smaller ones to apply the lube.

As well as during sex I tried this lube with a sex toy I was testing recently and found a few squirts lasted until my happy finish, which was a while as it was an exhaustive test! LOL Even when I’d done there was not a hint of stickiness.

We like this lube as you can tell.It’s safe, practical, long lasting and therefore economical.

Posted in sex, sexual health

I use my rechargeable massager internally

I use my rechargeable massager internally. Its meant to be used externally (unless you have a specific attachment) but I really like the feeling of being stretched I enjoy fisting too- and the violent vibrations are just amazing.

us painting.We had never spoken of the artist (or art generally) or my need for a keychain, so I was totally confused by it.The night ended up being totally awkward and I never heard from that guy again.Oops.The Game, Part Two came out with a chapter about giving presents as a means of seduction? Has anyone else ever had a guy do this, or do I just have a gift? (Ha, get it?) Or..s it because he thought I was the sentimental (ahem, cheesy) baby photo-loving type that it seemed like I would also be really into scented candles? My mind is thoroughly boggled.Pause while he opens and sniffs the candl.

to get the highest point of the Cleo sitting inside my vaginal opening and the smaller resting against my clit. I did tell you that this massager encourages you to be experimental and quite inventive.

I pressed the + button until the vibrator moved through the programmes to a pulsing one and rested back against the wall of the bath letting those powerful vibrations ripple through me and the water.? How deliciously decadent it felt to be enjoying the warm enveloping water coupled with those vibrations, soothing me.

And all of this totally hands free save the changing through the programmes and believe me I tried them all. This was the most enjoyable soak I’ve had in a long time, pampered doesn’t quite describe just how good I felt as I pulled the plug.

However you do need to note that whilst the Cleo is quiet on dry land it does tend to vibrate the bath, so you won’t be able to get away with using this surreptitiously but a small price to pay for such pleasure.

The best thing of all is that I still need to try this on the bed, on the side of the bath, on the shower wall…


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Competitors: Earn £250 Honor Discount vouchers or perhaps a Free of charge Teddy Keep!

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Fancy winning £250 worth of vouchers to spend online with Honour? Simply take part in our Refer A Friend campaign on Facebook to be in with a chance.You can buy a whole lot of latex, PVC and leather clothing and.

wing.I am the oldest child of two, after all.J and I alternate which family gets us the 24th and which family gets us the 25th to be fair, and my parents and sister are learning to appreciate the time they do have with us.But J and I are lucky—both of our families were always great about welcoming us BOTH.We never felt uncomfortable or like we were unwanted; thats why Js family feels like my family and my family feels like his.

But I know of a girl who said her parents would KILL her if she brought her BF home for the holidays.Her family does live a few hours away from where she.

strange reason randy…

I find being in the great outdoors at one with nature and being isolated from the world outside extremely exciting. As I lifted the duvet I knew it was going to be another self indulgent experience.

My pussy was prepared for this, wet and appreciative. I rubbed the distinctive nub of the Ascendancy against my clitoris, initially up and down. It felt good on continual vibration at top speed. Escalation was good but far from hitting my spot.

It was one of the pulsation settings that coupled with a side to side movement struck me dead. ? One minute I was all composed and the next, writhing uncontrollably.

This vibrator has the key elements to lead you through the doors of pleasure.But isn’t quite sure of its credentials when it comes to delivering good clean fun. The advice is that you cleanse the Ascendancy by wiping it down with a wet towel!? Not such a good thing for us regular sex toy users.

Having said that I thought this massager was a good one for both beginners and experienced? user alike, it’s all in the translation.

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Lovemaking as well as Reproductive system Wellness: the entire year within Evaluation


A wonder drug – the new one

A good month for women in Malawi as misoprostol – a crucial drug to treat post-partum hemorrhage and other reproductive health issues – was registered in the country for the first time. Post-partum hemorrhage (severe blood loss after giving birth) causes 25% of the 358,000 global maternal deaths each year, reaching up to 60% in some countries in the developing world.

The World Health Organisation recognizes misoprostol as a crucial intervention in the prevention and treatment of post-partum hemorrhage, as it can both be given to women in their third trimester to decrease their risk, and immediately after birth if hemorrhage occurs. Registering the drug in as many countries as possible should be a priority, so women across the world can benefit like those in Malawi.


New challenges to women’s health in the US

Sexual and reproductive health once more took on a political dimension in the US. Heated debates occurred in the House of Representatives, with Republicans and a small number of Democrats calling for an end to Title X funding for family planning for organizations also providing abortions. Expect to see abortion dominate the headlines throughout the 2012 Presidential election campaign.


Women in focus

The 100th International Women’s Day brought an opportunity to think about the 215 million worldwide who want, but cannot access modern contraception so they can choose how many children to have, and when. High maternal mortality and unsafe abortion rates in the developing world mean that many women die as a result of an unplanned pregnancy, a situation which could so easily be rectified were access to contraception improved. Governments and donors must recognize that family planning is one of the most cost effective and most needed health interventions they can support.


Morning-after pill controversy

The emergency contraception pill Levonelle was controversially made available free on the NHS through pharmacies in Wales. Marie Stopes International welcomed the move, with spokesperson Dr Paula Franklin saying that: “The decision by the Welsh Government to increase access to emergency contraception is an important step forward in preventing unwanted pregnancies and abortions amongst women in Wales.” In England, emergency contraception is only currently available free on the NHS via GPs and family planning clinics.


A wonder drug – the original

We celebrated the 50th anniversary of the oral contraceptive pill, a revolutionary development which gave women the opportunity to control their own fertility for the first time and .

ulating four individual photographs of the human female vulva to produce four subtle, yet different, colour conditions ranging from pale pink to red.

These images were then presented to 40 heterosexual males with varying levels of sexual experience who were asked to rate the sexual attractiveness of each image.

The results showed that the men rated the reddest shade significantly less attractive than the three pink shades, among which there were no significant differences in rated attractiveness.

Dr Sarah E. Johns, lecturer in evolutionary anthropology and lead researcher in the study, said: Our results really challenge the commonly held view that the colour red promotes sexual attractiveness by acting as a proxy for .

ensation is intense as the blood rushes back to your clit. You could try it out with a clothespin before buying a clamp to see if you like it. However, some clothespins have a bit of a bite to them, so try it out on a nipple first! Happy clipping!!Small and usually inexpensive (unless you go for full on clit jewellery, which can be both stunning and pricey), there is no reason to not give a clit clamp a go – you might end up just as pleasantly surprised as I did. These are good ones to try: Adjustable Clit Clamp with Bell and the Cleopatra’s Pleasure Clip..

Posted in sex toys, sex toys for men, sexual news

Sexting Teenagers Tend to be Making love?!? It’s Not really Precisely Large Information

Once again, the headlines have jumped all over the sexting behavior of teens, implying that they are irresponsible, that sexting is some kind of gateway drug to sexuality intercourse, and that parents should be afraid—very afraid. The latest headlines included: Sexting Linked to Sexual Activity in Teens, Teen Sexting Linked to Real World Risky Sexual Behavior, and Sexting Teens More Likely to Be Having Unprotected Sex. These headlines all reference a new study that appears in the October issue of Pediatrics. It found that teens who sext were more likely to be sexually active and more likely to have had unprotected sex than teens who did not sext. Before we panic and lock up our teens or their smartphones, it’s important to look closely at the study and remember that what it found was simply correlations, not causation. A part of me wants to say, um duh, or as a colleague put it, that’s kind of like a headline saying “Beer Linked to Drinking Among College Students.” The finding was neither particularly surprising, nor particularly enlightening. Still, we can look closely at the new report and see what it found.

The Study

Researchers attached a secondary questionnaire to the Youth Risk Behavior Surveillance Survey (YRBS) that was given to high school students in the Los Angeles Unified School District, asking about their sexting behavior. The YRBS is an anonymous survey, so researchers could not connect the answers on the secondary survey cheap male vibrators to those on the complete YRBS. Therefore, their survey asked for demographic information and repeated some questions about sexual behavior. Unlike the YRBS itself, the secondary survey also asked students whether they considered themselves to be heterosexual, homosexual, bisexual, transgender, questioning, or unsure of their sexual orientation.

The survey found:

75 percent of respondents reported owning a cell phone and using it every day.More than 15 percent of respondents with cell phones reported ever sending a “sexually explicit message or photo.”41 percent of respondents with cell phones had ever had oral, vaginal, or anal sex, and 64 percent of these used a condom the last time they had sex.

Additional analysis by the researchers found:

African-American students were more likely than their peers to have sent sexts, as were students who identified as LGBTQ.Students who knew someone who had sent a sext were 17 times more likely to have sent a sext themselves than their peers, who said they did not know anyone who had sexted.Respondents who had sent a sext were statistically significantly more likely to have ever engaged in sexual intercourse and “exhibited a trend toward unprotected sex during their last sexual encounter.”

The authors conclude that this data “reveal that sexting is associated with physical sexual risk taking. Unlike work that has suggested that sexting is a low risk or healthy alternative to sexual risk taking, we find that there is a clustering of sexual risk behaviors which includes sexting.”

The authors do note some limitations. First, they point out that their study took place in a large urban school district whose students may not be representative of students in most towns and cities across the country. They also note anal toys that they did not distinguish between oral, anal, and vaginal intercourse; nor did they define “sexually explicit.

ry to get away from the abuser and/or call for help so other people become aware of the situation.

Child abuse data show that the majority of children keep abuse a secret, Knaff said. That means it is even more important that parents not only talk to their children about what child abuse is and emphasize that it is never the child’s fault. Abuse is always wrong, and children should report it to a trusted adult. Parents need to keep the lines of communication open and seek out their children whenever they feel like something is going on with their child or their child is behaving differently in some way from usual.

To encourage children to report any abuse, parents should let the child know about two or three people designated as safe adults the child can talk to if he or she suffers abuse or feels unsafe.

Children need to know who they can talk to, Knaff said. They also need to be encouraged to tell what happened to them to more than one person and keep telling until someone believes them and does something about it.

Knaff also recommends parents specifically teach their children to report any touching that feels uncomfortable or wrong, even if it is by a family member, teacher, coach, pastor or church official, youth group leader or another child.

How to talk to your child about sexual abuse: ■Tell your child about good touch — a hug or a pat on the back — and bad to.

) Great!!! It’s waterproof (added bonus) and pretty quiet! The clit stimulator hits the right spot and the anal probe can be inserted or left ] so it just tickles the end. The vibe can also be switched around and I found the vaginal bit was also great for anal!! Really soft material, well made, but just the right amount of firmness! Only takes two batteries too! Pretty easy to clean as well! This is recommended!If you were wanting to add a little Easter treat to your basket, this might be the one for you. I know I’m going to go and add it to my wish list now..

If you want to choose some sex toys, please visit our website:

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Posted in sex toys, sex toys for men, sex toys for women, sexual news

Developing a Sexually Wholesome Culture

In late July, the XIX International AIDS conference was held in Washington, D.C. It had been 22 years since the conference was last held in the United States, largely due to the unwillingness of the United States to grant visas for HIV-infected individuals; a ban that was only recently—and only partially—lifted as it left brutal dildos sex workers and intravenous drug users out.

The conference is history but not its lessons. Medical advances, improved access to care, prevention initiatives, and revived determination were all part of the progress noted by presenters, but as a global culture we need to shift our perspective to stop the spread of HIV.

Recent news of pre-exposure and post-exposure prophylaxis treatment has also been encouraging. This summer, the Food and Drug Administration (FDA) approved the drug Truvada for Pre-Exposure Prophylaxis (PrEP) to prevent the spread of HIV to high-risk, healthy individuals. Similar preparations are under investigation, and HIV therapeutic drugs are being developed for prophylactic use. These drugs are very costly and require individuals to adhere to rigid compliance in order to be effective.

Secretary of State Hillary Clinton gave the plenary address at the AIDS conference, calling for realization of President Obama’s determination to create an AIDS-free sexuality generation. With advances in treatment and prevention, she declared that we could see this within our lifetimes. But will we really see an end to AIDS?

While we see great progress in halting mother-to-child transmission, we have not seen this in other populations. New infections have ebbed slightly, but we still see an alarming rise in i.

ssection on an 83-year-old cadaver. The dissection established the presence of the G-spot, a well-delineated sac structure located on the dorsal (back) perineal membrane, 16.5 mm from the upper part of the urethral meatus, creating a 35 degree angle with the lateral (side) border of the urethra.

Having 3 distinct regions, the G-spot emerged with dimensions of length (L) of 8.1 mm x width (W) 3.6 mm to 1.5 mm x height (H) 0.4 mm. Upon removal of the entire structure with the adjacent m.

it more receptive to stimulation cheap sex toys for men from you, her own hands or even a sex toy, and the sensation can last anywhere between five and 30 minutes, depending how much you apply.So in other words, with an orgasm booster working it’s magic coupled with you stimulating her with your fingers or a mini vibe, you’ll be on a fast track to making her climax. Why not put some of these orgasm boosters on your Valentine’s shopping list: O’My Clitoral Stimulating Gel and Flower Power Lip Balm, which will provide your girl with a sexy, tingly feeling when massaged into her clit..

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Posted in Anal toys, sex toys, sexual news, vibrators

Spider Hands free Realistic Male.

Give him a treat this Christmas with my blog’s range of sexy toys that he can use or – better still – you can use on him. Create orgasmic sensations and improve his libido with our pick of the crop for men. All of our top toys for him can be gift wrapped too, to make that present extra special.Read on to discover our top toys for Christmas 2011 or browse my blog’s Christmas Gift Guide 2011 and delight that special person with a perfect gift.See Giftwrap | See more Sexy Christmas Gifts for HimTo watch videos, you need Version 9 or greater of the Flash Player.Click here to see which Flash Version you have.

ecret Garden 10 Speed Clitoral Massager, both from Zini’s Secret Garden range.You also get Free UK Delivery on allSex Toysat my blog.Zini Ran Secret Garden Rechargeable G-Spot Vibrator 99.99A slimline vibrator with a gently sloping tip that’s perfect for G-spot exploration. Rechargeable, splash proof and crafted from silky-soft silicone, this luxury vibe is the perfect stimulator for inside and out.Find out more: Zini Ran Secret Garden Rechargeable G-Spot VibratorZini Seed Secret Garden 10 Speed Clitoral M.

e recommend blindfolding your lover and using this vibrator all over their body. The softness of your fingers alongside the added vibration of the toy means they’re in for a real treat! Best Lesbian Erotic 2013£11.99 Love smut? Best Lesbian Erotica 2013 should be on your Valentines wish list! Seriously saucy short stories from cover-to-cover, perfect for erotica inspiration. Edited by Lambda nominee Kathleen Warnock, and selected by literary legend Jewelle Gomez, we think this anthology will have something to turn you on! Ling-O Vibe£7 Oral pleasures are a top priority for many folks, and there’s only one thing better than a good tongue-lashing… and that’s a tongue-lashing with added vibration! The Ling-O Vibe is a teeny tiny vibrator that attaches to your tongue for an extra special session. At only £7, this little vibe is ideal as a small token of your affection, with long lasting results!Thats our top five toys for today!

If you have Version 8 or less, get the latest Flash Player here.You also need to have JavaScript enabled in your browser.1. my blog Wild Double Stroker – 12.99This is a brilliantly versatile male sex toy to use alone or with a partner and makes a great starter toy for any guy. The stroker is reversible, with tight ridges on one side and delicious bumps along the other and in addition to offering new sensations, the Double Stroker also helps to build stamina.2. Tracey Cox Supersex Sensation Stroker – 19.99The Sensation Stroker from Tracey Cox is perfect for spicing up both solo sex sessions and erotic couple play. Three chambers produce incredible sensations as you stroke your shaft and the see-through sleeve gives you both an intimate view of the action. With over 40 fantastic reviews, it’s a sure-fire hit for him.3. Spider Hands free Realistic Male.

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They aren’t always a productive way of resolving a situation


rabbit vibrators

rabbit vibrators

If you want to add some extra thrills to your relationship, why not chooseagift you can share this Christmas? Our top couple’s toys are great for playing with on Christmas day and beyond. All of our top couple’s toys can be gift wrapped too, to make that present extra special.Read on to discover our top toys for Christmas 2011 or browse my blog’s Christmas Gift Guide 2011 and delight that special person with a perfect gift.See Giftwrap  See more Sexy Christmas Gifts for CouplesTo watch videos, you need Version 9 or greater of the Flash Player.

Although rows can be useful in bringing issues to the surface, they aren’t always a productive way of resolving a situation – hurtful accusations uttered in the heat of the moment can cause lasting damage to a relationship.Your partner needs to recognise that lashing out at you because of his current frustrations is not acceptable – point-scoring jibes at your personality will harm rather than help matters. You both need to break this pattern, and your best bet is to agree some ground rules for discussing legitimate concerns – have this discussion not when you’re bickering but when you’re both feeling calm, so that in future you can have constructive dialogues rather than rows.Go for a long walk toget.

Click here to see which Flash Version you have.If you have Version 8 or less, get the latest Flash Player here.You also need to have JavaScript enabled in your browser.1. my blog 10 Function Remote Control Dream Egg Vibrator – 24.99Perfect for discreet, sexy play both in and outside of the bedroom, the Dream Egg is a vibrating love egg powered by an intuitive remote control. Hand over control and let your partner massage, tease and delight you with the powerful, yet very quiet vibrating motor which offers 3 speeds and 7 patterns. A fantastic toy to get couples in the mood and to create a playful atmosphere.2. Tracey Cox Supersex Twin Silicone Vibrating Love Ring for Couples – 14.99Powerful and cunningly designed, this twin ring is worn during sex to bring you double the pleasure and keep him firmer for longer-lasting erections. The supple silicone rings are easy to put on and the clever design keeps the .

an is wearing trousers, so Sh! Girl feels confident no man-parts could accidentally slip out, and starts to breath again.Oh! The innocence… Before Sh! Girl can react, Lady has bundled her man into the cubicle and is hands-on with the fitting herself. The curtain is drawn closed… There is muffled giggles and possibly purrs.Now, when Sh! Girl says “would you like to try on a harness?” she does mean try on and not try out! Sh! Girl hasnt got to the chapter on dealing with overly-frisky customers in her training manual but she knows this isnt right. She knows, too, even in the face of extreme challenges a Sh! Girl never compromises on service levels so she?bangs on the woodwork and firmly, yet?politely, asks the couple to vacate the cubicle.This seems to brakes the spell, or at least sobers the couple up, and they exit like naughty school kids caught behind the bike sheds. Frisky couple purchase the silicone dildo and harness (of course – it would be rude not to!) and skip out of the shop. Sh! Girl hopes it is to go and find a hotel room!.

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When Sex Gives More Pain than Pleasure

Not long after going through menopause, Denise Roberts (not her real name) began to feel severe pain during sexual intercourse with her husband. Penetration, she says, “felt like a knife inside me.” The estrogen and vaginal lubricants recommended by the various physicians she saw offered little relief. She felt ashamed, anxious, and inadequate as a wife, and she dreaded having sex.

Denise’s pain and frustration persisted for eight years before she heard about pelvic floor physical therapy, a technique that helps relax and strengthen muscles in the vaginal area. After several months of therapy and continued use of estrogen and lubricants, Denise felt much better. “It’s like a miracle,” she says.

Millions of women experience pain before, during, or after sexual intercourse—a condition called dyspareunia (from the Greek dyspareunos, meaning “badly mated”). This condition not only saps sexual desire and enjoyment, it can also strain relationships and erode quality of life in general. For postmenopausal women, dyspareunia may also raise concerns about aging and body image.

Many women suffer in silence and don’t seek the help they need, or they have trouble finding a clinician who can diagnose and treat the causes of their pain. That is unfortunate, because treatments are available for many of the problems that underlie this vexing condition.

What is it?

Dyspareunia (pronounced dis-pah-ROO-nee-uh) can happen at any age, but it’s particularly common among women who’ve reached menopause. Studies and surveys suggest that one-quarter to one-half of postmenopausal women experience some pain during sex. The pain can range from mild to excruciating; sufferers describe it as burning, stinging, sharpness, or extreme tenderness. Depending on its cause, pain may be located in the outer genitals (vulva), within the vagina, or deep in the pelvis. Many women feel discomfort mainly in the vestibule, the nerve-rich area surrounding the vaginal opening. Dyspareunia can start suddenly or develop gradually. Pain may occur every time with sex, or only occasionally. For some women, simply thinking about intercourse can start a cycle of tightness, pain, and avoidance of sex.

What causes it?

Possible causes include hormonal changes, various medical or nerve conditions, and emotional problems such as anxiety or depression. Often, many are at work. “One thing can easily trigger a cascade of problems,” says Dr. Elizabeth G. Stewart, a vulvovaginal specialist at Harvard Vanguard Medical Associates in Burlington, Mass. and Harvard-affiliated Beth Israel Deaconess Medical Center in Boston.

Vaginal atrophy, the deterioration of vaginal tissue caused by estrogen loss, is a major source of painful intercourse for women at midlife. When ovarian production of estrogen declines at menopause, vaginal tissue may become thinner, less lubricated, and less elastic. Eventually these changes can result in vaginal dryness, burning, itching, and pain. (Reduced sexual activity as well as medications such as antihistamines can contribute to vaginal dryness.)

Another culprit is vestibulodynia (also known as localized provoked vulvodynia), a chronic pain syndrome affecting the vestibule. Any kind of touch or pressure—not only from penetration but even from a tampon, cotton swab, tight jeans, or toilet tissue—can trig ger discomfort. Vestibulodynia is a type of vulvodynia, or unexplained and persistent pain in the vulvar area. The condition appears to have several different causes.

Vestibulodynia is the most common cause of sexual pain in women under age 50, and it may be more common among postmenopausal women than previously recognized, according to a recent study by investigators at McGill University in Montreal. Researchers analyzed data from 182 postmenopausal women with dyspareunia and found that almost all (98%) felt pain when touched on the vestibule with a cotton swab during an exam; 64% had both vestibulodynia and vaginal atrophy, 14% had vestibulodynia alone, and 9% had atrophy alone. Findings appeared in the Journal of Sex & Marital Therapy (March/April 2012).

Other causes of pain with intercourse include skin diseases in the genital area, such as eczema and psoriasis; conditions such as endometriosis, pelvic inflammatory disease, bladder prolapse, and infections of the urinary tract, vagina, or reproductive organs; certain cancer treatments; injury to the pelvic area from childbirth; reconstructive surgery; damage to the pudendal nerve, which supplies the vaginal area; musculoskeletal complaints, such as arthritis or tight hip or pelvic muscles; and some kinds of male sexual dysfunction (prolonged intercourse may increase vaginal friction and pain).

Psychological or emotional factors may be involved. Stress, anxiety, depression, guilt, a history of sexual abuse, an upsetting pelvic exam in the past, or relationship troubles can also be at the root of sexual pain. Some women experience vaginismus—involuntary clenching of vaginal muscles to prevent penetration. Vaginismus is especially common among women who associate the vaginal area with fear or physical trauma. “If you’ve had a painful early experience, like a horrible episiotomy repair, the pelvic floor muscles seem to remember and make the vagina say, ‘Nothing comes in here,’ ” says Dr. Stewart.

Few physicians specialize in vulvar problems, and few medical schools provide much training in this area. But your primary care provider or gynecologist may be able to refer you to someone with experience in treating dyspareunia. You can also search online or contact the gynecology department of the nearest medical center or teaching hospital.

Your clinician will ask about your pain—when it began, where and when it hurts, how it feels, and what you’ve done to relieve it—and may have questions about your relationship with your partner. She or he will also want to know about your gynecologic history (e.g., surgeries and childbirths) and any medical conditions or concerns.

The evaluation usually involves a thorough medical history and pelvic exam, and sometimes procedures or tests (such as laboratory tests for infections). The clinician will examine your vulva, vagina, and rectal area for redness, scarring, dryness, discharge, sores, growths, and other physical signs that might help explain your dyspareunia. She or he will probably use a cotton swab (to test for sensitivity to touch), a speculum, and gloved fingers during the exam. Understandably, women with sexual pain often worry about having a pelvic exam. Talk to your clinician about your concerns before the exam begins.

Lifestyle and self-care

Here are some ways to manage vulvar discomfort and increase sexual pleasure.

Lubricants – Nonhormonal vaginal lubricants and moisturizers may help reduce friction and pain during intercourse. (Lubricants are applied just before sex; moisturizers are applied more regularly, for longer-term relief.) There are many brands with different ingredients, and finding the products that work for you can take time. Vegetable oil is an inexpensive option; however, like other oil-based lubricants, it can weaken latex and shouldn’t be used with condoms.

Sexual techniques – Extend foreplay to increase moisture in the vaginal tissues before intercourse. Try switching positions. Experiment with different ways of being intimate. And communicate with your partner; speak up about what does and doesn’t feel good.

“Use it or lose it” – Frequent sexual activity can help stretch and strengthen muscles and increase blood flow and lubrication. But if intercourse hurts, practice masturbation or different ways of being sexually intimate that don’t involve penetration.

Gentle vulvar care – Wash with mild soap or plain water, and pat dry. Avoid perfumed, multi-ingredient products such as bubble bath, douches, and some panty liners. Wear loose clothing and choose cotton underwear. Rinse the area with cool water after urinating.

Treating dyspareunia

Treatment often requires a multifaceted approach that includes medications, other therapies, and self-care (see “Lifestyle and self-care”). If your clinician identifies any vaginal infections, skin ailments, or other treatable conditions, she or he will prescribe the appropriate antibiotics, topical corticosteroids, or other medications. Frequently prescribed strategies for managing dyspareunia include the following:

Vaginal estrogen

Local low-dose estrogen helps most women with vaginal atrophy; it’s also recommended in some cases of vestibulodynia and vulvar skin problems. It comes in a cream (applied to the vulva or in the vagina), a small tablet inserted in the vagina (Vagifem), and a flexible vaginal ring worn continuously and replaced every three months (Estring).

In treating vaginal atrophy, vaginal estrogen is preferred to systemic hormone therapy, which is taken in pill and other forms, with or without a progestin. Systemic hormone therapy has been associated with an increased risk for heart attacks in older women, stroke, blood clots, and some cancers. Vaginal application releases little estrogen into the bloodstream, so it carries less risk of side effects than systemic estrogen. But discuss the pros and cons of vaginal estrogen treatment with your physician—especially if you have a history of breast cancer, since its safety in this population isn’t yet clear.


This numbing agent may help ease sexual discomfort when applied as an ointment to the vestibule before and after sex. (If it’s used before sex, it may affect the male.)


Women with stubborn and severe vestibulodynia may want to consider an outpatient procedure called vulvar vestibulectomy, which removes some vestibular tissue. This surgery is usually offered only after other medical approaches have failed.


Emotional and psychological issues, from anxiety to poor communication in a relationship, can contribute to painful sex, and painful sex can put stress on a relationship. Talking with a professional counselor or sex therapist may help.

Anatomy of the vulva

The vulva consists of several layers that cover and protect the sexual organs and urinary opening. The outer lips of the vulva—the labia majora—contain fat that helps cushion the area. Inside the labia majora are the thinner flaps of skin called the labia minora, which join at the top to enclose the clitoris. The area between the labia minora, the vestibule, contains the openings to the urethra and the vagina.

Pelvic floor physical therapy

Pelvic floor physical therapy is relatively new, and there aren’t much hard data on it yet, but experts consider it safe and effective. Many women with vulvar pain have tight or weakened vaginal and pelvic floor muscles. These muscles can weaken as a result of aging, childbirth, excess weight, hormonal changes, and certain physical strains. They can also tighten in response to genital pain. Physical therapy can help reduce tightness and improve muscle function.

Your physical therapist will use hands-on techniques such as massage and gentle pressure to relax and stretch your tissues and promote blood flow, including (when you’re ready) the interior of the vagina. You’ll also learn exercises to help strengthen pelvic floor muscles and ease tightness in the hips. A biofeedback machine may be used to monitor your progress on a computer screen linked to a small sensor in your vagina. Therapy may take eight to 12 sessions before results are noticeable.

“Pelvic floor physical therapy works, but it’s not a magic wand; the patient has to do her homework during and after treatment,” says Raquel Perlis of Wellesley, Mass., a registered physical therapist who specializes in treating pelvic floor dysfunction and dyspareunia. Homework may include self-massage, hip stretches, and the use of vaginal dilators to help penetration feel more comfortable.

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3 Types of Sex Headaches—and How To Avoid Them

Q. I sometimes experience bad headaches during sex. Should I be worried and is there anyway to prevent them?

A. Although sex is often perceived to be a tension reliever because the aftermath of an orgasm leaves a person feeling relaxed and somewhat sedated, sex can result in the wrong kind of fireworks for some people. A small percentage of people, an estimated 1 percent, experience headaches during or after sexual activity. These headaches are also known as “orgasm headaches” or “coital headaches.”

Men seem to get sex headaches up to five times more frequently than women, according to the Encyclopedia of Neurological Sciences, although it’s an ailment that’s tough to get accurate stats on because doctors may not routinely ask about it and patients may keep quiet because they’re embarrassed to mention sex. A 2003 study in the journal Neurology surveyed 51 patients who had been diagnosed with sex headaches and found that they tended to occur mostly in men, peaking during the early 20s, or in the late 30s and early 40s.

The Encyclopedia of Neurological Sciences describes three types of sex headaches:

Dull Ache
This is said to be similar to a tension headache, and starts with a dull ache on both sides of the head that intensifies during sex. A possible cause is involuntary muscle spasms that can occur during sex.

This severe and throbbing ache occurs right before, during or after an orgasm and is the most common headache associate with sex.

Upright Ache
This headache occurs after an orgasm, sometimes arising immediately and sometimes having a delayed onset, but worsening when a person stands up.

Headaches are simple to recognize but hard to diagnose, and are sometimes super-tough to treat. That’s because there are so many potential causes. Sex, like exercise, is a form of physical activity, and headaches while working out are surprisingly common. I wrote about exercise headaches here.

The most common treatment is pain-killers. So if sex headaches are common, you should discuss medical options with your doctor. And if you suddenly start getting them or have a change in the pattern of headaches you get, you should consult with your doctor in case they are signs of an underlying medical condition.

With all headaches, spotting the triggers — and avoiding them — can help. I wrote about which foods and drinks might cause a headache to kick in here. If there is any sign that you have a headache looming, then refraining from sex may also help.

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